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Sunday, December 28, 2008

Reflections..

Of late it's only tags that's keeping my blog alive and so I decided to add one more to the list. I promise this will be the last in this year :P In fact Jolly Roger had tagged me last year and I'm taking this up after exactly an year !!! Better late than never..

I think I can easily say 2008 was the toughest year in my life. In January, I lost my dad and in December(rather yesterday night), I lost my pet dog. My mom was inconsolable coz after I came to B'lore, the only two beings whom she was used to is no longer there, creating a huge void which can't be filled at all..

1. What did I learn?
Lot of things but mainly handling loss and taking more responsibility.

2. What did I accomplish?
Probably a better understanding of myself. Also I guess this year I was more expressive about my feelings and emotions especially in a public forum like this. Initially I had lot of reservations even to make my blog public but now it's more easier for me to blog about my feelings rather than talk to someone in person(although I am not sure whether it is good or bad)

3. What would I have done differently?
I am normally a person who doesn't have any regrets, but there is one thing that I feel I should have done differently. Emotionally I am a brick wall and usually keeps all the sentiments to myself. Last year for my dad's b'day I wrote this post and left it at that. I never bothered to tell him how much he meant to me although I knew he would have been very happy reading that.. In fact one of my dad's friend who is in Canada saw this post and he took a printout to show it to him. But by the time he came it was too late and all the words are still left unsaid...

4. What did I complete or release?
Professionally? Release is a word we use mostly in office and so I'm tempted to write about that. We did one major release and two minor releases for our product. considering the fact that the team is totally new with lots of freshers I feel this is really an achievement.

5. What were the most significant events of the year past?
Do I have to repeat it again? But may be on a happier note I had a beautiful niece last month.

6.What did I do right?
I would like to believe that I did everything right to the best of my knowledge and ability. Of course I might have made mistakes but it's all a learning experience.

7. What were the fun things I did?
I took a much needed vacation in Thailand. Some new things that I tried out are Para sailing and under sea walking and yeh it indeed was real fun.

8. What were my biggest challenges/roadblocks/difficulties?

Balancing the time spent for blogging/blog hopping and other things that interests me in life(like reading, sketching, crafts etc) ;) Hopefully next year I can find a healthier balance and be more creative :)

9. How am I different this year than last?
Not much different I'm afraid.

10. For what am I particularly grateful?

Friends and family who always stood by me and is my support system

That's all from my side. Since it is a New Year meme anyone and everyone is free to take this up. Do let me know once you have completed it.

Sunday, December 21, 2008

10 simple ways to save yourself from messing up your life

1. Stop taking so much notice of how you feel.
How you feel is how you feel. It’ll pass soon. What you’re thinking is what you’re thinking. It’ll go too. Tell yourself that whatever you feel, you feel; whatever you think, you think. Since you can’t stop yourself thinking, or prevent emotions from arising in your mind, it makes no sense to be proud or ashamed of either. You didn’t cause them. Only your actions are directly under your control. They’re the only proper cause of pleasure or shame.

2. Let go of worrying. It often makes things worse.
The more you think about something bad, the more likely it is to happen. When you’re hair-trigger primed to notice the first sign of trouble, you’ll surely find something close enough to convince yourself it’s come.

3. Ease up on the internal life commentary.
If you want to be happy, stop telling yourself you’re miserable. People are always telling themselves how they feel, what they’re thinking, what others feel about them, what this or that event really means. Most of it’s imagination. The rest is equal parts lies and misunderstandings. You have only the most limited understanding of what others feel about you. Usually they’re no better informed on the subject; and they care about it far less than you do. You have no way of knowing what this or that event really means. Whatever you tell yourself will be make-believe.

4. Take no notice of your inner critic.
Judging yourself is pointless. Judging others is half-witted. Whatever you achieve, someone else will always do better. However bad you are, others are worse. Since you can tell neither what’s best nor what’s worst, how can you place yourself correctly between them? Judging others is foolish since you cannot know all the facts, cannot create a reliable or objective scale, have no means of knowing whether your criteria match anyone else’s, and cannot have more than a limited and extremely partial view of the other person. Who cares about your opinion anyway?

5. Give up on feeling guilty.
Guilt changes nothing. It may make you feel you’re accepting responsibility, but it can’t produce anything new in your life. If you feel guilty about something you’ve done, either do something to put it right or accept you screwed up and try not to do so again. Then let it go. If you’re feeling guilty about what someone else did, see a psychiatrist. That’s insane.

6. Stop being concerned what the rest of the world says about you.
Nasty people can’t make you mad. Nice people can’t make you happy. Events or people are simply events or people. They can’t make you anything. You have to do that for yourself. Whatever emotions arise in you as a result of external events, they’re powerless until you pick them up and decide to act on them. Besides, most people are far too busy thinking about themselves (and worry what you are are thinking and saying about them) to be concerned about you.

7. Stop keeping score.
Numbers are just numbers. They don’t have mystical powers. Because something is expressed as a number, a ratio or any other numerical pattern doesn’t mean it’s true. Plenty of lovingly calculated business indicators are irrelevant, gibberish, nonsensical, or just plain wrong. If you don’t understand it, or it’s telling you something bizarre, ignore it. There’s nothing scientific about relying on false data. Nor anything useful about charting your life by numbers that were silly in the first place.

8. Don’t be concerned that your life and career aren’t working out the way you planned.
The closer you stick to any plan, the quicker you’ll go wrong. The world changes constantly. However carefully you analyzed the situation when you made the plan, if it’s more than a few days old, things will already be different. After a month, they’ll be very different. After a year, virtually nothing will be the same as it was when you started. Planning is only useful as a discipline to force people to think carefully about what they know and what they don’t. Once you start, throw the plan away and keep your eyes on reality.

9. Don’t let others use you to avoid being responsible for their own decisions.
To hold yourself responsible for someone else’s success and happiness demeans them and proves you’ve lost the plot. It’s their life. They have to live it. You can’t do it for them; nor can you stop them from messing it up if they’re determined to do so. The job of a supervisor is to help and supervise. Only control-freaks and some others with a less serious mental disability fail to understand this.

10. Don’t worry about about your personality. You don’t really have one.
Personality, like ego, is a concept invented by your mind. It doesn’t exist in the real world. Personality is a word for the general impression that you give through your words and actions. If your personality isn’t likable today, don’t worry. You can always change it, so long as you allow yourself to do so. What fixes someone’s personality in one place is a determined effort on their part—usually through continually telling themselves they’re this or that kind of person and acting on what they say. If you don’t like the way you are, make yourself different. You’re the only person who’s standing in your way.

Got this as a forward sometime back. Wanted to share it with you
Wishing you all a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year in advance :)

Tuesday, November 25, 2008

How to handle men???

Oh no I'm not at all an expert here and would be the last one to give any advice on this topic. ;) If you are a girl and came here to get some dating tips I am so sorry to have disappointed you..

Anyway I started this topic for a different reason. Someone came to my blog looking for "How to handle men neighbors while staying alone". Unfortunately she got only the thief story and some comments there. But it triggered a thought process in me. I have been staying alone for 2-3 years now and before that I was 'virtually' staying alone. In the sense my cousin used to work in evening shifts and reached home only by 3-4 am when I will be deep in sleep. Same way when I get up he would have snarled under the blanket and we never got a chance to meet. We used to communicate via notes on the almirah and meet only during weekends. If either of us had to travel on weekends even that won't happen. There have been times where,in spite of staying under the same roof, we have met face-to-face after a month or two and wondered stuff like u have gained/lost weight!!!

Sorry I am digressing.. Coming back to the point, at least in the place that I am currently staying, I feel so safe and secure especially because my landlord is very protective and filter out all the unnecessary and unwanted visitors who comes in different shapes and forms like door to door marketing / beggars / fund raisers etc. Also he make sure all the visitors I get are people whom I know well. But the problem is trouble always comes from the most unexpected sources rather than from complete strangers. These 'known' devils can come in any forms/shapes like say the middle aged 'friendly' neighbor (whose children are as old as you) who offers you a 'good time' if you accompany him alone to his farm house or may be even a close relative who is trying to make a pass at you..

And workplaces are not an easy place either. While some bosses like to conduct looong(3-5 hrs) one-to-one meetings every single day on the same subject for months together there are some others who always have a clarification just when you are about to leave and this will go on for hours. And once you somehow get out of the meeting, they will be too 'concerned' to offer a lift home. Then there are others who need a status update every hour and their proximity will be such that you will start doubting whether they have some hearing problem. I have also come across a cheapo boss who hacked into one of his subordinates machine and accessed all the private data and photos. And many a times we girls share our solos and girls only group snaps only within the girl's gang. And this guy intelligently accessed other girl's file shares from this machine and got access to those photos!! Problem here is most probably the targets will be the fresher/less experienced girls who won't have the courage to react to a person in power.

And then the roadside cameos. A friend has explained how she handled one here and this is just one sample. Have faced situations where people in cars/bikes offers you a lift and they gets so angry if you ignore them and just walk off. One of my friend was once dragged to a car that too in a busy street just in front of the office. Luckily she was saved by some passers by. Now if you thought it's only people using public transport who have this problem you are mistaken. If a girl is riding a vehicle, there are people who tries their best to throw them off balance or create a dent/scratch in the car and then they will blame the girl for improper driving. Once Me and a friend was coming back from Nagarhole and there was an Omni following us for almost an hour in the Mysore-Bangalore stretch. Although it was a four lane and they could have easily overtaken us, all the time they were behind us blinking the headlight. How much ever we slowed down for them to go in front they were coming in the side trying to be too close. It was just too irritating..

So the question here is how to handle these men?

1) It's easier to tackle the first category of known devils as they are mostly cowards just trying their luck on any random person. You don't even have to waste your words as just a sharp look will make then run for cover and they won't dare to show their face again.
2) Workplaces is more tougher coz it is difficult to ignore/avoid contact with your teammates/superiors whatever the case may be. But no point in suffering silently like most people tend to do. Instead it's better to react openly and if it still doesn't end there, don't hesitate to complain to higher officials/HR.
3) For me the absolute strangers are more difficult because we have no idea whether they are maniacs or mentally retarded or demeans. So as much as possible I try to get out of that situation/place. But yeh that's not a solution. I admire Sini's courage to react and confront them.

Whatever I described here are just a few samples that came to mind as I sat down to wrote this. I am sure every single girl will have one or other such similar stories to tell with varying severity. May be I should ask you how you handle/have handled such situations? The floor is all yours..


PS: Don't mistake that all men are like this. I have so many good male friends who are very understanding and supportive. But the problem is although the above said species are a minority(?), it really makes the girl very insecure and depressed..

Tuesday, October 28, 2008

Me and my addictions..

The moment I blissfully retire into my cocoon, my fellow bloggers conspire to pull me out of it :( Latest culprit is Usha who has asked me to list down my addictions. Do I really look addicted? hmmmm...

1) Internet : What else can take the No 1 position? This addiction is eating up all my time and even hindering many other creative things that I used to indulge in before. So I am fighting to overcome this. Although I am not that successful in the mission at least I'm not showing any withdrawal symptoms ;)

2) Junk food : Give me anything junk - chocolates, burgers, pizzas, fried stuff,.. I will happily replace any meal with this. Now if u ask is that the reason why I'm bloating up - Not at all. That's hereditary :P

3) Hoarding : Anyone remembering my pandora box ? Although as I grew up there are some slight changes to the things I hoard, the habit more or less remains the same :) The problem with this addiction is that over a period of time it consumes lot of space both in the real and virtual world (what else do u expect with digicams and loads of downloads). Moreover it's taking lot of my time and energy to clean up the spaces.

4) Procrastination : Something that I hate in myself :( Even if I decide to get over this addiction and take up things early enough, Parkinson's Law "Work expands to fill the time available for its completion" comes into effect. So invariably I finish the task just before it's meant to be finished. Then it's time for the next guilt - I took up longer time than needed for the task :)

5) Constancy : This is inspired from Usha's addiction. She seems to be addicted to change where as I am just the opposite. Change in any form is not my cup of tea :) I had written a whole post on how much I hate change here and so no need of any further explanation :)

That's all that I could think of in the time line that I have allocated to myself (Refer point 1). Now you thought I will let you read mine and get away with it? No way. I am passing the baton to everyone who commented in the previous post :)

Sunday, October 19, 2008

Samir loves Priya.. So?

Does any of you care how they expressed their love and how it stood the test of time? Isn't love a feeling between two people and isn't it sufficient that only both of them know about it? What is the necessity to scribble your names and hearts in stone? And how happy you will be to know that the wall/building you defaced during the early days of your courtship is still defaced by the expression of your love!!

There are very few things that irritate me and the recent Reliance Ad is one of them. I find this ad very stupid and irresponsible. For those who doesn't know, the ad is about a seemingly well-off and well-qualified husband on his way to Simla talking to his wife faraway at home without any disturbance, thanks to Reliance Mobile. As they are reliving their old memories, he reaches the spot where he and his now wife had engraved 'Samir loves Priya' in 1999 and finds that their deed has stood the test of time. The idea is to show that the phone network is strong and stays put even in remote, hilly areas and highways.

But isn't it high time that the ad-makers exhibited some civic sense? As it is our monuments and heritage building are hardly well-preserved. We Indians have an intrinsic habit of scarring anything that we can lay our hands on with love-birds’ hearty expressions - be it monuments, heritage buildings, trees, stones,.. And this ad is just glorifying this age old habit by highlighting it in a romantic and desirable fashion. It is so sad that creative team at the agency could not find any other metaphor to showcase timeless love. What happened to I&B Ministry and Advertising Standards Council of India (ASCI) who axed many a commercials. Does they find this ad acceptable? Or is it that they don't care about being responsible and conscious about having a clean society? Anyway there is no use just ranting and not acting upon it. So if you also feel the same about this commercial, please complain here : http://www.ascionline.org/regulation/howtocomplain.htm. I have no idea how effective it is, but no harm in trying..

Saturday, September 20, 2008

Eternal Worrier !!!

Have you come across them? I guess most of the mom's fall in this category and mine leads the flock!! I think they just loves to worry about anything and everything. Mine even goes to the extend that if she doesn't get anything she just creates something and worries about that imaginary problem.. If I'm little late for the train she starts worrying that I will miss the train. Btw late means I left 55 mins before than the recommended 1 hr (and the dist bn my house and railway station is just 1.5 km that can be covered in less than 10 mins).. I have an endless list like this.. Here is the latest..

Conversation that happened yesterday.
Me : Amma I'll be going to Chennai on Sunday. Will be back on Monday.
Amma : Chennai?
Me : Yes
(Worrying starts)
Amma : Why do you have to go? How will you go? Will there be anyone to help? .....
(I don't remember all the questions now)
Me : I don't have the details yet. Will call you once I get it.


Today early morning.
(She wouldn't have slept for sure)
Amma : Are you really going to Chennai?
Me (wondering whether I missed telling her) : Yes. My tickets are confirmed.
Amma : Will someone be there to help?
Me : My Finnish counterparts will also be there. But they are driving down and is staying in a different hotel. I didn't get bookings in that hotel.
Amma : That means you are traveling and staying alone?
Me : What is the problem? I have the tickets and hotel booked. Pick up and drop from airport is also arranged.
Amma : How will you know who is going to come to pick you up?
Me : It will be a cab of course and it's arranged by the office travel agent.
Amma : But what if you get into a wrong cab? Chennai is a bad place. Not safe. Someone else can come and pick you. You don't know the place at all.. How will you know that they are taking you to the correct place?
Me : Ammaaaa this is not the first time I am traveling.
Amma : It's not like how you have travel alone abroad. Nor like how you travel around with friends for trips..
(and the worrying continues with things like how will you eat? , How will you stay alone in the hotel? etc etc. )

OMG I never imagined a simple client visit can get this complicated. I know she is not going to sleep till I'm back on Monday! Now if you thought this is only for cases where I'm traveling alone.. Sorry you are mistaken.. There will be umpteen reasons for others as well - language , food, terrorists, climate , new place , new people,..
What to do? Any remedies?

PS: There are lots of people who asked me why I was missing in action. There was no specific reason. Just didn't feel like writing :) May be that's blogger's block.( i.e If having a blog makes me a blogger :D)

Monday, July 21, 2008

The Bucket List

It's quite some time since Sandeep passed on the baton to create my own bucket list. And he is making sure I don't forget about it.. hmmm

The tag is basically based on the movie The Bucket List and tells you to make the list that you want to do before you kick the bucket. When I saw the tag, the first thing that crossed my mind was to write a will!! That was the time amma was dragging me to banks to add the nominee name or to change the joint account holder, some things that I was never bothered about till date. And at that time there was one question in my mind - 'what if something happens to me?'. I know it's a pessimistic outlook,but these are some reality that needs to be addressed as well..

Anyway that apart, my wishlist would look like this.. I am not looking at the practicalities here.. Just that when you dream, dream really BIG..:)

1) Travel the world

This will be one thing that tops my list.. I would like to travel around the whole world and enjoy the beauty of each and every place may be in all seasons.. hmm Why that smile? Is it too much to ask for? Do you really think so? Then may be I will stick to only the 1000 places listed in the best seller "1,000 Places to See Before You Die" What say? :P

In fact, I'm not very much interested in the much talked about tourist spots. In all my trips I look for peace, serenity and natural beauty and so mostly I aim for the off the beaten track kind of places and of course there are plenty of such places.. So now the question is where do I start? The easiest for me will be to start with India - places like Valley of Flowers, North east regions, Kashmir,..etc. But then I realised I haven't visited places like Rajasthan , Lakshadweep , Andaman , etc and don't want to miss out on that either.. And I don't mind revisiting places like North Sikkim in another season..

And coming to outside India, I have visited only a few places in Europe. There are lots and lots of places which were in my list - always missed the flower show in Keukenhof, the Black Forest, Prague , Greece , Switzerland , Scotland ,.. Then places like Australia , New Zealand , Egypt, Kenya , Malasia, Maldives , Thailand..

The list will go on and on.. Only thing now left is planning. May be I should decide to leave my city once a month and leave my country once a year.. hmm tough.. Still I would try.. So anyone interested to join me for this expedition?

2) Go on a road trip with no predetermined destination

Yeh this is also related to the previous point, but when I say no predetermined destination I mean it. I have always felt that the road traveled is much better than the destination reached. But many a times we forget to stop n enjoy the beauty coz we have a predetermined destination to reach. When we used to travel in Germany we used to do this "Hop and Go" stuff. There if we take a ticket to the destination you are free to travel in any of the trains and the train frequency is 20 mins - 1 hour depending on whether it's within the city or outside. So whenever we saw a beautiful place we just got down in the nearest station and roamed around that place clicking away to glory. Once we are done we just hopped on to the next train and continued our journey.. This used to be real fun and I have got some really beautiful snaps in the process. I would like to do the same again especially in rural areas.. I am sure the life there is going to be really interesting and even more just the idea of setting out on a trip to no where is so exciting.. :)

3) Build a house of my own..

It will be my den built according to my OWN design.. It will have everything that I like and will be my comfort zone.. And did I tell you I like gardening too? So it will be a small house with a BIG garden.. Yeh a beautiful landscaped garden full of flowering plants of all sorts, a good lawn with a hammock to enjoy the evening breeze won't hurt either.. And yes my backyard will have a kitchen garden too..This can cater to the day to day needs of the kitchen ( Not sure whether this is really my interest or mom's influence)

4) Own a pet

My house won't be complete without my pets.. And what all should be there? Of course dogs will be the first choice. There are lots of breeds that I like - Golden Retriever , Coker Spanial, Lasapso , Pug.. and of course how can I forget Sony - So German Shepherd , labrador ,.. The ultimate will be if I have one of each of these breeds :) And yeh I like goats as well.. Yes u heard it right.. that explains my virtual pet also.. As a kid I used to play with the small ones from my neighborhood n God they were real fun.. and I should have cats n kittens too..they are so adorable.. What about rabbits.. They are sweet too.. :) And birds? Nope.. I feel so sad to cage them.. Instead may be my garden will have a bird bath.. Yeh that will be just fine :)


5) Have a baby

I am obsessed with babies and so this will come naturally to the list. So I'll start with a sweet cute baby girl.. Why baby girl? coz then I can deck her up with all those pretty frocks n hairdos n what not.. But then she will be bored alone..In that case twin girls will be just right.. wow two cute identical twins..double fun it will be..:) On second thoughts why to limit the number? I will have as many as my home can accommodate.. Oops then I should keep this in mind while designing my house.. But then there is one glitch.. I like these babies to remain as babies for ever and never ever grow up and lose their innocence.. Any remedy for that?

6) Swim in the sea and drive a car in b'lore roads

ha ha basically I'm looking for some courage here ;) I can swim in a nice calm pool how much ever deep it is, but in a rough sea where waves are coming over you is something different. For that you should have more faith in yourself.. :P
Same with driving in b'lore roads. I used to take my car in my hometown, but once I came to b'lore I literally froze. Now even if I go back home I hardly take it out. Again just a matter of practice, but I should take the first step.

I think it is better to stop dreaming now :) Too long a list will only be a burden ;) Let me first work on these and make it attainable :P

Now whom to pass this on? Most of the people whom I visit have done the 8 things tag which has a subset called "8 things to do before I die". So it doesn't make sense to tag them although I would like to see their exclusive list. Anyway how about tagging some of the new friends.. Probably it's a long list, but still..

So the tag goes to

Ms Cris
Sharanya
Bindhu
Alex Mcone
Nikhil
Shreejith
Roshan
Arun Paul

In addition I also tag

Prashant - He has already done something that most of us would like to do. Went for a Solo bike ride across India- 35 cities, 18,000 kms and lots n lots of experiences.. Would surely like to what crazy things he would like to do next ;)

Wednesday, July 16, 2008

Hairy tales

The girl looked at herself in the mirror. Today is Wednesday. The blue ribbon day. Yeh that's part of her uniform. Royal Blue skirt, White shirt and hair plaited on both sides tied by the specific colored ribbon on top and a rubber band at the bottom. In primary classes, when her hair was not long enough for a plait, it was just hair parted as ponytails on either sides. Still the ribbon was mandatory. It's Blue from Monday to Wednesday and white on the other two days. There was a time in her primary classes where she longed to have long hair just like her cousin. She looked and re-looked everyday to see whether it has grown. Unfortunately cousin had almost knee length hair or so it looked in front of the cropped hair of the girl!!

Then there was ammamma who would religiously oil her hair every weekend. The girl hated this ritual for the simple reason that oiling meant pouring half the bottle of oil on her head and then brushing that sticky oily hair for another half an hour. The reasoning behind pouring of oil used to be "tala tanukkanam"(Head should cool down) and the brushing was for lice(No Medikar or such products allowed). After that is the washing part - using only chembarathi tali(hibiscus leaves) or some such similar herbal stuff. Shampoo or soaps were a strict No No. But the problem was that these herbal shampoos managed to wash off only 1/4th the bottle of oil and the remaining 1/4th still remained on the hair for the rest of the week!! But ammamma was clever enough and managed to continue this ritual talking to her about the beautiful long hair she would posses if she looked after the hair properly and the poor girl duly obliged. By the time she reached high school, the girl did have long hair, but by then the fascination had ended. Perfect example of you won't like what you have :)

Times slowly changed.. Ammamma grew old and didn't have the energy to look after her hair. So no more oiling or brushing the hair.. Sometimes the girl wasn't even patient enough to remove the tangles and used a scissors instead!!! Even the mandatory plaiting on both sides became an issue as her hair never got dried properly after the evening wash even the next morning. The girl soon outgrew the two side plaiting of school and adopted the more common single plaits during college. Her job and the subsequent relocation forced her to discard all the herbal shampoos as well. The lack of pampering started showing slowly on the hair.. Her long haired cousin relocated to USA and adopted a shorter hair style and the gal kept wondering how roles are interchanging!!! Now a days she is even contemplating about adopting her cousin's path.. Let's see..

P.S : If you are wondering why this post? - I just plaited my hair on both sides to reduce the tangles and when I looked myself in the mirror, was taken straight back to the school days. This hairstyle was so much part of me (n mostly of all girls) in school. How I wish things as simple as plaiting hair on both sides can act like a time machine and take us to those wonderful times :)

P.P.S : If you are still wondering why such a silly post? - that's what can happen to you if you are confined to home, rather bed, for almost 2 weeks with no one to talk to :P

Sunday, June 29, 2008

A hate post!!

Usha tagged me to list five people whom I hate and I never thought I will take so much time to complete it. Honestly I couldn't think of anyone whom I really hate. Of course I am not a goody goody person, but I do try to look for the good and ignore the bad in people. It's because I believe no one is perfect and I would have much more negatives than what I find in others. As they say when you point one finger at someone, four fingers are pointing back at you.. But since I need to complete the tag I'm listing some characteristics of people that irritates me although I'm pretty indifferent to all these types and believe that even the most annoying of persons can be effectively ignored ;)

1) People who do not respect others time

I always try to be on time whenever I have an appointment or meeting and most of the time I end up waiting for others to turn up !! There are times where I have waited for 2-3 hours and had to change the entire day's plan. This is something that really drives me crazy coz I feel so helpless. You take all the pains to be on time and end up looking like a fool where as the other person just gets away with a lame excuse or a simple emotionless 'Sorry'. Unfortunately this is one case where you are at the receiving end and can't ignore like in any other situations. Anyone has any suggestions to handle this?

2) Fanatics.. irrational people

If I have no business with them I go with the live and let live policy and leave them to live in their false paradise. But if it is something that affects my work or life in anyway I do react. I try to put across my point but as the definition rightly puts it 'they just can't change their mind and won't change the subject'. That's when I really get frustrated and might even loose my temper.

3) People who 'uses' others to get what they want

I have seen this behavior in many forms. There is one category who are experts and consciously do this. If they have something to be done they will suddenly be so friendly and will be calling you or visiting you every now and then. But the moment their work is done they simply vanish into oblivion. Then there are others who tactfully tag along with someone and make sure all their expenses are borne by others. The main quality of them is that they make sure they find the apt bakra's for taking care of them. It's fine for 1-2 or 3-4 or 8-10 times. But I do get irritated if it's eternal.. In fact I am too affrighted to ask or take even small help from friends thinking I might unknowingly fall in this category :)

4) "Delicate darlings"/ People who 'act' childish

This is the one category of girls that you see around everywhere. These types will be perfectly normal in the company of girls, but the moment they see any guy in the vicinity the whole tone changes so much so that sometimes I wonder had they acted in movies, they would have definitely won an Oscar!!
And yes there is one more category of girls who thinks getting married and becoming a baby-producing machine is the ultimate goal in life. But this is minus all the responsibilities associated with a family life. They have seen all the romantic movies and believes that life is all rosy rosy just the way it is portrayed in the films. The only talk that they can sustain is about marriage or about some handsome guy 'they think' is suitable for them! Sometimes I try to put some sense into their head, but it's of no use. Here also I choose to ignore and try to be in some other meaningful company..

5) Eternal cribbers

This kind of people crib about anything and everything - work, people, family, food, infrastructure. You feel tired listening to them.. Many a times I try to change the topic but still they always manage to come back to square one. I choose to avoid them as much as I can..

Wow I am done with the five points :) Now it's time to spread the hate vibes around ;)

I tag

Sini : Would love to listen to her hate list :)
Jo : Haven't seen any new post in her blog. Let this be a trigger ;)
Eashwar : He voluntarily took up the previous tag and I would love to see him do this one also :)
Santosh : I am sure this is a surprise for you. I am just trying to change a fullstop to a semicolon :)
Nanditha : A new friend I found in the blogosphere. I like her blog..

Friday, June 13, 2008

"I ..." Series

There was a time, not so long ago, when I was totally jobless in Office and was desperately looking for some time pass. I have no idea how I reached this space, but the moment I started reading I got hooked to it. This was one of the first links that appeared in my blog. I liked everything about it - the way she presented day to day matters,her attitude towards life,the simplicity of her language,.. There were moments when I could relate, moments where I felt she stole my thoughts and words.. I read and re-read all her posts and became a regular visitor from then on.. With the arrival of her little one, the tone of her blog changed to that of a mama relishing motherhood.. Her chronicles are so real that it's as if Puttachi(that's what the little one is called) is growing in front of our eyes.. Many of her baby posts have made me (rather most of her readers) crave for a baby of our own although she is quick in giving a reality check that life is not all that rosy in the baby-world :) Although I have delurked at times, I was following her blog almost silently and so was pleasantly surprised when she tagged me.. So Shruthi here it is.. I have retained some of the answers which I felt is apt for me also..

-------------------
I am: different, just like everyone else :)
I think: too much
I know: my limitations
I want: a peaceful life
I have: everything that I need
I wish: I could roam around world without bothering about anything
I hate: deception
I miss: my childhood friends and the happy times we had
I fear: being a burden to anyone
I feel: responsible for all my actions
I hear: only what is needed
I smell: jack fruit (it's in the next room)
I crave: for chocolates any time any day
I search: for myself,but don't know where to start ;)
I wonder: why people unnecessarily complicate things
I regret: nothing. (Every step is a learning experience)
I love: to be busy
I ache: for children suffering for no fault of theirs (esp in cases like divorce or unwedded mothers)
I care: about others more than for myself
I am not: the best,but I try to do my best
I believe: in the goodness of people.
I dance: my own dance
I sing: silently
I cry: only if no one is seeing
I don’t always: try hard enough
I fight: for what I believe is right
I write: so badly, still I write !
I win: if there is no one to compete :)
I lose: if I am convinced I am wrong
I never: go against my values
I always: keep my promises
I confuse: faces and names
I listen: sincerely when people are confiding in me.
I can usually be found: engrossed in some craft works
I am scared: of losing my memory
I need: good companionship
I am happy about: the way things are right now

-------------------

And now passing the lantern part: I have been collecting tags for some time now. Some of my friends tagged me so long back that even they would have forgotten about their tags ;) So I'm passing this meme to all of them just for an indication that promises will be kept and your tags will appear in this space,sooner or later.. ;)

The list goes like this

Usha
Sandeep
Jolly Roger
Amey ( I know two are pending from you :( )

I know an open tag is not usually picked up, still I tag everyone else who would like to take up this tag. Go ahead, it's interesting..

Sunday, June 01, 2008

An autobiography

My name is Sony and I am new to this area. If you are wondering who this is : I'm the guest editor of this blog. The owner of this blog seems to be too busy to give any attention to this bog (I don't think she is that busy - just plain laziness..grrr) Anyway today I decided to revive this space.. But I am in a confusion as to what to write. I haven't written anything ever in my life nor do I know any interesting issues to write about. So thought I'll jot down something about myself and the events that have occurred in my life. What say? So here I am, ready to tell you my story and will do the very best that I can.. Are you people ready to know about me?

I can't remember much during the early days of my life. I just know that I was born on july 4th 1996. My parents are of different origin but I guess Mom
and Dad didn't face much opposition from the family. Anyway when I was born I was like any other baby in this world - totally dependent on mom just like my siblings.. It was all fun - feeding , playing (means fighting with my siblings) and sleeping.. Initially it was more of feeds n sleep but gradually we opened our eyes and started exploring the world on our own..

Life was going on smoothly and one day we got a visitor. He was very friendly and played with us for sometime. While leaving he took me also in a cardboard box. It was my first travel experience and I was a little tensed, but managed it somehow. Our journey ended in a house and the cardboard box carrying me was taken to the car park. As soon as I popped my head out I saw an excited girl in a green top and white midi. hmm that was the first time I saw this girl and we fell in love that very moment.. Later I realized that I was a surprise B'day present for her..

Of course I missed my mom and siblings and cried a lot for the first 1-2 days. But this girl made sure I'm comfortable and soon I got adjusted to my new home. Of course I was very naughty like any other kid of my age. Don't get me wrong. Nothing that serious.. just small small things like hiding slippers, scratching the sofa (don't think they changed the sofa coz of me.I didn't make that much damage), chewing anything that fits into my mouth be it plastic , magazines , papers her text books or photo albums (How am I supposed to know it's very precious). Sometimes I get scoldings or beatings from her for these, but amma was always there for my rescue. She used to tell that all babies are like this and you need to be patient with them. Anyway I continued my pranks and I used to go and hide behind amma or under the Sofa whenever she gets angry..

My day used to start at 5.30 am when acchan opens the door for milk and newspaper. Then I go for a walk in the compound for my morning rituals. After that I used to comeback n sit with acchan. He wasn't very fond of me but used to bear me nevertheless( I'm too cute to resist u see). Acchan normally gives me breakfast and once I am full I'll be restless (read bored). Then I'll go n wake up that lazy girl (Why can't she wake up along with me and play with me. Otherwise I wouldn't have disturbed her na) But that itself was a task- licking her face , rolling her in the bed, climbing over her.. ho a herculean task indeed. Finally she gets fed up n will run to chase me. That's the start of our typical day. These playing and fighting will continue till night except the few hours when she's in the college..

I had fun with her friends too whenever they come home. Some of them were scared of me, but others were very friendly and used to play with me. Some of them used to come home only to meet me. She used to tell that I don't mind her whenever her friends come. Why should I? Anyway I'm seeing her all the time. So any new face is always welcome.. ;) Night I used to sleep in her room. Although I'm not supposed to sleep on the bed, once she falls asleep I do climb up. Why does she want the whole bed for herself?

Days were so peaceful those days. I was slowly changing to a fully grown adult - taller and heavier. Oh btw I forgot to tell you about my romantic interest. He was our next door neighbor. Same origin as me. But what to do? He was tied up by his family and we couldn't proceed. I tried breaking the barriers by walking over the compound wall. But even I was helpless beyond a certain limit and so that relationship faced a tragic end. But I would say this was not as painful as what I had to face in the latter years. I never knew my life would take a 180 degree turn like that...

The changes happened when the girl completed her studies and moved out. There was no one to play with me, no one to talk to me , no one to fight with me. I was very depressed and grew very ferocious out of my frustration. I even stopped eating for many days. Acchan and amma were not able to control me and they had to bring in an official trainer to keep me under control. That guy really tortured me and amma had to intervene and tell him not to come again. Of course by then I also came in terms with the situation. No other way out right? After that my living space was shifted from inside the house to outside the house :( I know we are meant to live outside and guard the house. But again the first few years of luxury had spoiled me so much. hmm all good times come to an end.. Anyway after that I have been a good guard and concentrated on taking care of the house..

Now I feel I am growing old and is in the last stages of my life. I have a growth in the stomach and have difficulty in walking.. To top that last few months were not so happy when acchan passed away. No one told me that but I could sense that. I was so sad and was crying for days. Since I couldn't eat also everyone thought even I would pass away that time itself. Then I realized that my duties have now increased and I should be even more responsible.. Life should move on..

That is all I have to say about myself. Now that you know me whenever you come near my house don't forget to come and say a 'wuf'. I am still fond of friendly new faces.. :)

Sunday, April 20, 2008

The thief at mid-night

Time is past mid-night. Two out of three inmates of the house are mostly drowsy and is getting ready to sleep and the third one is already fast asleep.

Let's call them A , B and C. It was the time of late night ghost serials and A was very much fond of them; but never had the courage to watch them alone.. That's the reason why she made B also to sit with her while watching the serial. Both of them wanted C also to give moral support, but C didn't oblige and went off to sleep. Now that the serial is over, A and B decided to sleep although they hadn't yet gotten over the scary feeling..

Suddenly they hear some knocks from outside.
knock.. knock...knock..

They listened. It's getting repeated in pattern.
knock.. knock...knock..

Both of them clung to each other and listened.. Surely the knocks are getting repeated again
knock.. knock...knock..knock..

They woke up C
C : What's the matter?
A & B : We are hearing some sounds..

C listens. But now it is silent

C : What sounds? I can't hear anything
B : I guess it stopped when they heard us talking
A : Then let's be silent for sometime and listen

..
..

C : Stupid girlies. You watch all sorts of crap and this is the result. No more ghost serials from tomorrow..
B : No we really heard the knocks. It was real.
A : It was like someone trying to break open the door..
C : Don't be silly. It's all your imagination. I am going back to sleep. You better sleep now.

C was about to go under the blanket and then..
knock.. knock.. knock..

B : Listen. We told you

Sure enough the knock was very much distinct. Then C also joined the bandwagon and together they started interpreting the sound.

A : Is someone really trying to break into our house?
C : What else can cause such a noise in the middle of the night?
B : This house is too old. If they are trying to break the door,it will give away soon.
C : What do we do now?
A : Shall we call uncle?
(Uncle is the landlord who stays upstairs)
B : No we can't disturb them at this time. It's against the agreement.
(B is the one who first took the house and so knows about all the terms and conditions. A and C joined later and so doesn't know the history)
A : what agreement?
B : When we three girls approached to rent out the house he had asked who will help us if we fall sick in the night or so. He had told us that it will be difficult for them to take care of us as they are too old. So we said BB will help us if we need anything.
(BB is B's cousin brother who stays 10 km away)
C : hmm that's also true. Even if uncle comes he can't do anything to the thief. So shall we call BB?
A : But by the time he reaches here, the thief would have already entered :(
B : Then shall we call the 'neighbour aunty'
C : Yeh that's a good idea. That uncle and their son would be able to handle the thief.
A : Fine. We 'll call them then. But what's their no?
C : We don't know :( We never thought of getting their number as the house is too close.
B : Oh my God. Now what to do? We can't open the door to go and call them.

Suddenly neighbour's gate opens and someone enters their house which means the neighbours are still awake, much to the delight of the girls. The thought that if they scream someone will come for help gave the girls some courage.

C : We'll do one thing. We 'll just go to the back and check what the thief is doing. We'll call for help when we see him.
A : Are you sure you want to do that? I will faint if I see him.
C : It's ok. Anyway we can't go to sleep allowing him to break open our door. So do or die.
B : Yes that's better..

So the girls slowly opened the bedroom door.
Knock.. Knock.. Knock..
The sound is getting louder.

A : Has he already entered the house? I am getting a feeling that the sound is coming from inside and not outside
B : Even I am getting that doubt now
C : We will see. Let's get in to the kitchen
They reached the kitchen and sure enough the sound became louder.
B : Thank God the sound is coming from outside.
C : Yes the thief is in the courtyard just outside our back door I guess

C opened the door to idanaazhi and lighted the lamp in the courtyard.
Suddenly the knocking stopped.

B : I guess the thief realized that we are awake and stopped breaking the door.
C : Guess so but what do we do now?
B : I am getting scared. Shall we call BB before opening the door.
C : But he can't reach immediately anyway. We have to deal with it ourselves
A : Yes we'll open the door and scream. That'll fetch the neighbours and we will be saved.
B : Just for security, I will take the kitchen knife too.
C : Ok fine but we can't do anything with it. We'll call the neighbour uncle and that's the best option.

With that C opened the door sure enough the thief was right out there.. Trying to get out and not in!!!

A rodent who got caught in their waste basket and struggling to get out..

Monday, April 07, 2008

APPLICATION FOR ANY SUITABLE POST

I was reading Mathew's post and later saw this mail. First I thought it's a funny forward, but apparently it's a real application and his resume is also attached!!!
It's been sent to 320 recipients, all in the To list.

So here is the mail that I got as it is for your kind prusal and hope he here from u soon.

Dear Sir

Please find attached my detailed resume for your kind prusal.

Presently Iam working with Namaskar Travel, Murgab, Kuwait as a Messenger

Hope to here from you soon.

Thanking you

Very truly your
***** *****
Tel: ######


And and excerpt from the resume


OBJECTIVE:
Long-term or permanent, progressive position with an organization where present skills can be expanded upon and professional growth is the result of demonstrated ability. Presently Working in Kuwait.


I wouldn't have felt so weird if the person was not qualified enough. But apparently he is an automobile engineer. Is our educational system so bad?

Tuesday, April 01, 2008

Some Insights!!

Mathew tagged me and I thought this is the best way to overcome my lethargy. So here it goes..

1. LAST MOVIE YOU SAW IN A THEATER
A malayalam movie called "New Delhi"
I hate to admit it, but I am "theater-phobic". My parents had a tough time with me coz mostly they'll book tickets n I'll be weeping uncontrollably so much so that they'll have to cancel the movie plans.. :(
But yeh I do watch movies in the TV or DVD, the last one being Taare Zameen Par (yeh I know it doesn't count for this question)


2. WHAT BOOK ARE YOU READING?
‘Beyond the Last Blue Mountain’ A life of J.R.D.Tata by R.M.Lala. Started reading this sometime back and stopped it in between. Have restarted it now.
One more book I am reading in parallel is 'tuesdays with Morrie' - a book borrowed from the library that we have newly set up in the team.


3. FAVORITE BOARD GAME?
Snakes and Ladders :P


4. FAVORITE MAGAZINE?
It used to be Readers Digest but now I mostly pickup Outlook Traveller or Better Photography. And when I go home it's Vanitha and Grahalakshmi.


5. FAVORITE SMELLS?
The Smell of Rain ;)


6. FAVORITE SOUND?
A baby's blabber, Pitter-patter of rain


7. WORST FEELING IN THE WORLD?
Feeling of loss


8. WHAT IS THE FIRST THING YOU THINK OF WHEN YOU WAKE?
What are the things to be done today


9. FAVORITE FAST FOOD PLACE?
I rarely eat out.


10. FUTURE CHILD'S NAME?
Nanda, Gopika, Devika, Athira,..


11. FINISH THIS STATEMENT. "IF I HAD A LOT OF MONEY I'D...?
Absolutely clueless.. May be I will buy a farm house with a big garden ;)


12. DO YOU DRIVE FAST?
Nope. Think the fastest I have ever done is around 60-70 km/hr


13. DO YOU SLEEP WITH A STUFFED ANIMAL?
Back home I used to have my doggie or the cats who used to share my bed. But here though I have some stuffed animals, they usually occupy my brother's bed which is empty after he moved out.


14. STORMS-COOL OR SCARY?
I've experienced only one in my life : that was the sand storm in Leh n Yeh it was cool :)


15. WHAT WAS YOUR FIRST CAR?
I don't own a car although I sometimes drive my parent's Alto.
If you are asking the first car I have driven it's a white ambassador from the driving school.


16. FAVORITE DRINK?
Mango juice :)


17. FINISH THIS STATEMENT, "IF I HAD THE TIME I WOULD .....
Do the same things that I do currently. All it matters is how you utilize it.


18. DO YOU EAT THE STEMS ON BROCCOLI?
Yes, I don't like to waste food :P


19. IF YOU COULD DYE YOUR HAIR ANY COLOR, WHAT WOULD BE YOUR CHOICE?
I like it the way it is - Black.


20. NAME ALL THE DIFFERENT CITIES/TOWNS YOU HAVE LIVED IN.
Thrissur and Bangalore


21. FAVORITE SPORTS TO WATCH?
Used to watch cricket and Tennis, but of late nothing.


22. ONE NICE THING ABOUT THE PERSON WHO SENT THIS TO YOU.
Humorous to the core


23. WHAT'S UNDER YOUR BED?
My mobile and the book I'm reading.


24. WOULD YOU LIKE TO BE BORN AS YOURSELF AGAIN?
Yes very much


25. MORNING PERSON, OR NIGHT OWL?
Both !!


26. OVER EASY, OR SUNNY SIDE UP?
Neither. I hate eggs.


27. FAVORITE PLACE TO RELAX?
My room


28. FAVORITE PIE?
Apple Pie.
Haven't tasted anything else.


29. FAVORITE ICE CREAM FLAVOR?
Chocolate Sundae


30. OF ALL THE PEOPLE YOU TAGGED THIS TO, WHO'S MOST LIKELY TO RESPOND FIRST?
PS Considering that she has promised herself to write at least two posts a week :)

And this tag goes to..
Unfortunately most of the people have already taken this tag or is already tagged by someone else :( So I tag everyone else who haven't yet done this tag :)

Sunday, March 16, 2008

Introducing Vignette

As I have mentioned before, I am a shutter bug and love clicking pictures of anything and everything. I used to post pictures in flickr which is a fantastic place to hang around and lots and lots to learn.. But flickr free account holds only 200 photos and my limit was over sometime back. Many people asked me to take a pro account for unlimited storage and continue posting there itself. It is not costly either considering all the benefits it provides. But I didn't want to go for one as I feel a pro account comes with a class of it's own and I am in no way eligible for that.. But sometime later when I am confident enough I might go back there ;)

In the meantime, I was thinking of an alternative and checked out some other photo hosting sites and blogger was also in that list. Unfortunately blogger doesn't have any decent photoblog template and although I tried to create one myself, didn't have much luck. So left it at that and even forgot about the same. But few days back I realized there were visitors to that test site that I had abandoned and many even left nice comments. So I decided to revive it and make it my photo blog :)

So here I am "officially" publishing my photo blog ;)

And a bit about the kind of photographs that you might find there : I have described the site as "My desperate attempts to stop a moment from running away.." and that's what it will be. I don't experiment much technically and so please don't expect any technically good snaps. I click anything that looks good to my eyes.. However I do appreciate your comments to improve my skills. So feel free and be ruthless in criticizing; that's the only way for me to learn and improve.. :-)

Btw the template reviving part was not so easy as I have absolutely no idea about html or xml. Anyway I hope, I have managed to come up with something with which I can start off. There are still lots more to do and I have no idea how to proceed :(

Some of my requirements are
- exif data extractor (there should be some tools/scripts available as most photoblogs seems to be having it)
- a broader page width and in turn a broader post width (this seemed easy but I couldn't find the correct parameter)
- An automatic thumbnail that link to the newer and older post like in aminus
Currently I need to add the thumbnail manually. I have a feeling it should be possible as there is a widget to get the newer and older posts. So there should be a way to change that to take the thumbnail as well. But it's only my assumption. Have no idea whether it'll work.

Any experts out there to help me out?

Friday, March 07, 2008

Does "M.G. Road" mean God-forbidden place in kannada?

I'm really getting this doubt when I see the face of autowalas the moment I utter this word. Even worse the way they accelerate and run for their life without even giving a second look.. On an average, I need to ask 30-40 autos(no exaggeration) to finally get a ride or on some unlucky days need to walk the entire 4 km distance!!!

Sunday, March 02, 2008

"...But don't YOU go anywhere"

[I apologize for blurting out like this.. I never intended for people to come here and feel sad. But writing has always been a way for me to vent my emotions and so I wrote this when I was feeling really low. Next day, I wanted to delete it, but there were already some comments,so I left it as it is..]


"How are you?"
This is the most frequently asked question to me in the past one month and my answer has always been "I am fine" or "I am doing good". I have no idea why I always lie to everyone, or for that matter even to myself, whenever I encounter such situations. Fact is, I have never been fine and have been struggling to appear normal all these days..

Sleep constantly eludes me when I need it the most.. Sometimes, I used to sit up quite late just to fight the memories..Coz the moment I hit the bed, how much ever tired I am , the memories keep flowing like a storm, keeping me wide awake for hours... I used to believe it was the sweet memories that kept us going, but now that I know none of them will ever come back again, it has become a painful realization.. I am gripped with an insecurity feeling when I realise the fact that the person who was my constant support all through my life is gone, and I have no one to turn to..

It's even more challenging when I come back to my hometown. The easy chair in the front varendah is now empty.. The person who always awaited my arrival with lot a of changes(coin denominations), in case I fell short of them for the auto, is no longer there.. There is no one to ask me how my train journey was or whether I got a berth or whether I slept well in the train. During meals, the chair next to me remains unoccupied, unlike the last time or the million times before.. He was the one who inquired about everything that happened and the one whom I talked to most in the family.. But now I find a strange silence surrounding me..

For me, being in Bangalore served as a kind of rescue, as I could get busy with my work or, at the very least, hallucinate that everything is normal and what happened was just a bad dream.. Sometimes when Amma calls me, I find myself waiting for her to hand the phone to Accha, yearning to hear his usual first question "Kunjumol bakshanam kazhicho?". He was always worried that I wouldn't eat properly especially when I was left alone.. However, Amma always ended the call without passing it to him..

Sometimes, I getup in the morning thinking I heard him call me, only to realise it was only uncle to give the milk.. How much I wish to hear his voice, his characteristic cough,... When I realise that it will remain this way forever, and we'll never ever see him again, I'm feeling dizzy..

People keep comforting me, saying he had a fulfilling life, and it was good that he passed away without much discomfort. I do understand that because just one month ago, he was diagnosed with a brain tumor and the doctors informed us that it was already in advanced stages and there was nothing much that could be done. He was rapidly losing his memory and required constant assistance. And they predicted that, in due course he would become paralysed as well. However, he never waited for his condition to deteriorate further.. His life motto was never ever bother others with your problems and he lived and died by that motto.. Many a times I have wondered why the symptoms never surfaced earlier, and I guess it was because he would have endured the pain silently..

No matter how much ever I try to comfort myself, I find it really difficult to accept the situation.. It just feels strange.. The day I came home in the morning just like any other visit, how we had breakfast together, how I said a hasty bye to him and went to attend a friend's marriage.. And just 1 hour later when I came back with all the marriage news to share, there was no one there to listen to me..

I know it wll be even more difficult for amma and I need to be brave and in control.. How I wish I had a sibling so that we could just look at each other and know that we share the same feelings.. Everyone keep scolding me, saying I should cry it out.. But how can I when I very well know that he never liked to see me in tears? I have no other choice but to hold it back, else I'll make him sad..

I know it's natural for our parents to die before us; but losing them is difficult to come to terms with, because you've lost part of your past, a part of yourself, a guardian, and lot more.. a hole is created and your world seems shattered..

Accha, I am missing you.. terribly.. Every single day..

Sunday, February 24, 2008

What's Yours?

I am amused, especially the blog design part!!!




Your Blogging Type is Kind and Harmonious



You're an approachable blogger who tends to have many online friends.

People new to your blogging circle know they can count on you for support.

You tend to mediate fighting and drama. You set a cooperative tone.

You have a great eye for design - and your blog tends to be the best looking on the block!

Saturday, February 23, 2008

How is it to lose yourself?

Your memory evades you and you forget everything - your wife , your daughter , your siblings , your family members , your best friends,..

You forget who you are , where you are ,...

Words fail you, you forget to speak..

You forget the house you were dwelling all this while , the way to different rooms,..

You forget to eat , to chew..

Someone has to be constantly there to take care of you , to feed you , to guide you ,..

It's like you become a child all over again..

Scary !!

Thursday, February 14, 2008

Food I Never Gets Tired Of..

Every morning I do a herculean task - The task is 'thinking' what to pack for lunch. Normal course is one curry (gravy) , one thoran (dry dish) and then rice mixed with curd. This menu varies depending on the time I wake up, the availability of vegetables in the house and of course my mood to cook. So some days it will be very elaborate lunch with all these items but some days it will be just one dish, either dry or gravy. Also there are days where I just make some colored rice or even pack a portion of my breakfast itself!! But whenever there is rice , it would invariably be mixed with curd. This is true even if there are other dishes as well. I don't follow the traditional course where you eat the curd and rice only in the end. I have survived many a years with only curd and rice (as vegetables spoils the taste of curd :P ) until one day I had to be rushed to the hospital with a dangerously low Hb count. So although I started eating vegetables from then on curd still remained as an indispensable item. And what's surprising me is I don't mind eating curd 365 days a year where as if it's any other dish I don't like repeating it the next day rather a while,for that matter(That's why 'thinking' what to make every day became a herculean task if that's what you were wondering). So what about you? Do you have any such "never get tired of" foods?

Thursday, January 31, 2008

My Pandora Box

My room has a wall sized rack and a shelf where I used to store all my belongings while in school and college. These were kind of untouched ever since I moved to Bangalore. So last time when I was home for a longer duration, I decided to check the same. And what I found there was quite interesting. It was like diving into my past and unveil the life of that silly little girl who treasured anything and everything.. Would you also be interested in having a peek?

First, a box full of 'manjadikkuru' and 'kunnikkuru'(abrus seeds). As a small kid, these colorful little seeds really fascinated me and I just loved collecting them.. The main source for this collection was Guruvayoor temple. There is a big vessel where these seeds are kept and children are made to play with it. It is supposed to make the children naughty just like Srikrishna! I still don't understand why parents invite such headaches deliberately! Anyway coming to the point, these used to be very sticky (as it will be filled with sweats of so many people) and so one or two would always stick to your hands which would eventually fall off in the pradakshina vazhi. I used to collect those spilled ones (of course with lot of scoldings from mom for picking up things from ground :P ) to come home and fill my jar.My manjadi collection grew with every visit to the temple. Kunnikkuru came from one more source. Near my grand mom's house this plant was there and these seeds used to be scattered all over the place. We didn't know the location of this plant and so had to satisfy ourselves by collecting the fallen ones. It was fun to run around to collect them and also our petty fights in the process. We even used to play different games with that. These seeds are so cute that I never felt like throwing them away even though I outgrew the games long back..

Next a box of Valappottu (Broken bangles). As small girls, we used to play a game with the broken bangles. We would shuffle a bunch of them with different colors and spread it over the floor. You need to pair two similar ones, draw a line in between and strike without disturbing others. Whoever collects the maximum number was the winner. I never had the habit of wearing bangles and so was always the one who contributed the least feedstock for the game. Since you tend to collect anything rarely available, this also became a collection although I have no idea from where or how I collected them!

Then I have a colorful plastic phone in the shape of a house. The house is green in color, the red phone handles would be resting on the roof of the house, then the white dial is in the front. I saw it in a shop and asked for it thinking I can replace the dull black instrument at home with this one! But then it turned out to be a 'kudukka'(a piggy bank) with a small opening at the back. My parents took that as an opportunity to implant some saving habit in me (Wondering why it never stayed but) and explained to me how I should use it. Anyway although I was disappointed by the fact that we should still use the plain old phone for making calls, I was excited with the thought that this little phone when filled would give me money to buy anything that I want.. But though I counted the coins every day, my phone was never full and I used to be desperate. Those were not the days were kids got lots of pocket money (at least not the 6 year olds) and so it was real hard for me to fill the box. The deal was if I find any loose coins in the house , I can take it and fill my kudukka. But most of the times I used to go to dad and ask for some coins. The generous person he was, he used to give me all the small changes and BINGO my bank used to be full :)

I guess it was in my second or third standard that we had to write a composition about "My Hobbies". Instead of making the students write it themselves, we had a ready made composition that we had to mug up (possibly this is the way it happens in all convent schools). The composition was quite detailed and gave step by step information about how to take the stamp out from the envelope without damaging it, how to store it properly, how to expand your collection and so on. Anyway end of it I realized I have a hobby called stamp collection without a single stamp in possession!!! Think like all kids in that age, I was also experimental and decided to try it out from then on .. Any letter that came home went under my careful surgical procedure. Luckily those were the time of snail mails and so I didn't have any problems for my collection to grow. Slowly as I grew older I took it little more seriously and expanded the collection by exchanging with like minded friends as well. But this died a peaceful death once I left school.

I also have a small collection of coins. This was when my 'phone kudukka' started collecting different shaped coins rather than the small changes (Of course even these were donated by my dad). Does anyone remember the old 10 ps, 20 ps, 5 paise coins? I also had some 1 ps and 2 ps coins from my mom's time!! But this also became stagnant after some time as it was not so easy to get different coins unlike stamps. Earlier, I used to expand it(rather tried to) by adding some left over Marks, Liras or Francs after any trips. Now after the single Euro system the variety is again gone :(

I was always crazy about craft works - now and then. I never bothered to specialize, I was eager to learn all - stitching, knitting , embroidery , hand works,... (Yeh jack of all trades, master of none). When all other students used to dread the work experience class, I was always looking forward to it. We had a choice of 2-3 items out of which a student can choose one and complete it in the course of the year. But I always completed all the available choices. So one section of my rack is filled with Wall hangings, baskets , mufflers,hand embroidery works, curtains, etc etc. Also a bag full of raw craft materials like beads, pakkeesa, embroidery threads, cross stitch kit, plastic wires..

Somewhere I saw a beautiful aquarium inlaid with shells and decided one day I should also have one like that. Think that was the spark for my shell collection. My dad's ancestral house is near the coastal area and many of my relatives stay very near to the beach. So our trips to these houses were never complete without an excursion to the beach where I was busy exploring every inch in pursuit of unique and beautiful shells. Also once I started earning and traveling around, I bought many big ones as well. That way I have a decent collection of corals and shells (though I have no idea how I got those corals) big enough for a room sized aquarium. But the irony is I'm yet to have my first aquarium!!

Then a neatly filed newspaper cuttings which is a collection of news or pictures that interested me from time to time. Think I got this habit from my mom who is a readaholic and treasured even a small piece of paper. I keep fighting with her for keeping all the pile of books and papers but never realized I have also inherited the habit though to a much lesser degree. This collection also has a subsection - picture cuttings(mostly advertisements). These are the ones that impressed me and and felt that I should draw it someday. But for most of them that day never came !!! Then there are lots of story books which filled my time(not free time), school and college magazines of every year and even some of my lab records..

A box full of letters and greeting cards. Yes I treasure each n every letter that has come to me. Sometimes when I feel down I pick up those cards or letters from my friends and that invariably brings back the smile on my face. It's interesting to read these one sided letters once in a while and guess the replies I wrote or just re touch the memory that such n such incidents happened at such n such time.How I wish I wrote more often now..

I am crazy about soft toys and of late I have a good collection, most of them gifts. But my first teddy bear was when I was a teenager. I knew my parents would never allow me to buy one, but I wanted one so badly. So I was determined to get it and started saving my scholarship money and finally after 3 years I had enough savings to buy one. It is a brown teddy bear about 3 feet tall from the Chandamama collections and costed me Rs.750/- (A decade before this value was much much more than it's present value). But soon after I bought it,a sense of guilt gripped me. I did something that my parents won't like, I spend my money for something which is just not worth it. But I guess teenage is always about such fluctuations.

Then the small gifts that I got for my b'days during college days. Each one of them thoughtfully picked and reminds me of the friend who is far off. Though we may not have regular contacts now, it just connects me with them instantly.

Oh how can I forget my beloved photo albums. Any trips , any functions I used to be the one who would collect negatives from everyone and take copies from every single cam. I have lots and lots of them so much so that my mom keeps complaining that one day I might need to rent out a whole house just to keep all my albums. Luckily digital world saved me that expense ;)

Think that covered almost all corners of my rack. If anyone remembered the character Urvasi played in the Malayalam film 'Midhunam', you now know who inspired the script writer ;) And if you think my room is a big mess with all these junk, yes it is - an ordered mess :P

Sunday, January 06, 2008

taare zameen par



I am not a movie buff and so hardly keep track of the latest releases, forget watching them. But "Taare Zameen Par" did arise my curiosity mainly because it deals with a dyslexic child. I was also interested to see how Aamir Khan,who is a perfectionist, would deal with the subject. So this weekend I made sure I watched the movie and I am quite happy that I did. Hats off to Amir Khan for handling the subject with supreme sensitivity and to Darsheel for portraying the child's world so brilliantly. No I am not here to write a review about this movie. I would leave that to the talented lot out there. But I would recommend you to watch the movie (if you haven't yet). You can relate it to your life and the lives around you. It would also change the way you look at your kids and would enhance our sensitivity towards children..